The close relationship you develop with another person should feel like a safe haven, a place you can retreat to when life throws you curveballs. But when drugs or alcohol take over, you basically become a second priority in the relationship. How can partners deal with an addicted spouse or does it mean that the relationship is over? Here are some important details that you should know.
How
Substance Abuse Affects Relationships
When one partner becomes addicted to
drugs or alcohol, a cycle of conflict is created that often leads to a toxic
relationship. Attending rehab for couples in California is typically a
good idea to prevent the relationship from getting to that point. Where
substance abuse is involved, conflicts can become physical and sometimes
violent. Instead of talking things out, disagreements arise about the substance
abuse itself, as well as financial issues typically connected to the substance
abuse. Other concerns include other legal conflicts and verbal, physical, and
sexual abuse.
How
To Support A Partner Without Enabling
It’s easy to want to help the addict deal
with their issues, but there is a fine line between helping and enabling their addiction. Enabling might
involve giving them money to help them obtain the source of their addiction, or
making excuses for thme on their behalf. Supporting an addict can take a
tremendous physical and mental toll on a partner, to the point that they no
longer have the energy to take care of themselves. This results in a
codependent relationship, where the spouse believes that their only role is to
save their partner from addiction. It is the only way they feel that they can
have power or self-esteem.
Forcing
A Spouse Into Rehab Isn’t Recommended
Some partners may feel as if they can
force their spouse into rehab in order to get the help that they need, but this
ends up having the opposite effect. There are some states that have laws
pertaining to involuntary commitment, but very specific
criteria must be met in order for this to come into effect. It must be
determined that the person is a threat to themselves or others, an addiction
has rendered them disabled, or that the individual lacks the ability to make
decisions for themselves, amongst other criteria.
Available
Resources
There are several resources and
communities that couples can seek when substance abuse is involved. It usually
involves both individual and couple therapy to deal with the issues and
complications that arise from substance abuse. Treating both partners in the
relationship tends to have a higher success rate, as well as reducing the
chances of the relationship or marriage ending.
If you or your loved one is dealing with
a substance abuse disorder, it’s important to speak to a mental health
professional as soon as possible. They can het you and your loved one the help
that you need to not only improve the state of your relationship, but to also
help you or your loved one overcome their substance abuse disorder.
